Yesterday I climbed Mount Kosciuszko. All the way to the top, so for a few minutes I was the highest person in Australia, not counting people in planes and on drugs. Here is a picture of me nearing the summit:
Yes it was FUCKING COLD. And the view from the top was spectacular, assuming you find peering out into a biting foggy haze spectacular. But still, it was pretty cool to get all the way to the top – on the way down I felt superior to all the plebs still hauling themselves up to the top.
I also felt cold. Very, very cold. I had to stop at the toilet block for a wee on the way down, and aside from the fact that my hands were so cold and painful I felt like an arthritic old nanna trying to unbuckle my jeans, my private bits looked appallingly shrivelled and sorry for themselves. Sorry, penis! I’ll try not to subject you to subzero temperatures again if I can help it.
